What to Say to Someone Who Resists Getting Vaccinated
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In order to stop the Covid-19 epidemic, medical experts tell us we need to achieve herd immunity. That means 70-85% of us having antibodies ready to leap against the spiky virus. We get antibodies either through contracting the disease—with a death risk 33 times that of the flu and long-term risks of heart, lung, and even brain problems—or by getting vaccinated.
The problem is, almost half of us don’t want to get vaccinated, at least not right away. This isn’t a medical problem. It’s a persuasion problem.
As a persuasion consultant who has advised pediatricians and military vaccinators, I have worked for years to convince resistant patients to accept vaccination for themselves or their children. Here are techniques that have been proven to work.
Be patient.
It usually takes more than one conversation to change a person’s mind. Work first on the relationship. The more the other person likes and trusts you, the more likely you’ll succeed.
Try to bring in someone who looks like the other person.
Half of vaccine resisters are Latinx, and 53% are Hispanic, according to a new poll. While people over 55 are overwhelmingly in favor, most Americans between ages 25 and 44 say they’re unlikely to get vaccinated. Persuasion tends to work better when the audience belongs to the same age and ethnicity as the persuader.
Don’t score points.
This is true of persuasion in general. Successful arguments aren’t about winning; they’re about winning over the other person, getting her to want to make your choice.
And avoid focusing on the facts.
Lots of research shows that when you throw facts at someone, he tends to retreat even farther into his own belief. Besides, vax resisters already have plenty of “facts.” They’re just not true. (No, Bill Gates is not putting tracking chips in the serum.)
Instead, speak personally but selflessly.
Don’t say how the vaccine will protect you. Tell who else you’re trying to protect. “My sister has cancer and can’t get vaccinated. I want to keep her safe as long as possible.” Or, “I want my mother to be able to hug me again.” Then gently imply that the denier would want to do the same thing. “You know what I’m talking about. I see how much your mother adores you.”
Appeal to the other’s identity.
People will do almost anything to confirm their best sense of self. Soldiers are willing to sacrifice their lives to live up their identity as soldiers. I once was asked by a Pentagon agency to come up with a way to persuade vax-resistant military members into smallpox vaccination. After learning how proud they are of their scars, I suggested a social media campaign in which soldiers took selfies of their vaccination scar and said what it was for. “This scar’s for my country. This scar’s for my girlfriend.”
Make the other person feel noble and smart, not dangerously stupid.
I advise pediatricians to praise a young mother who hesitates having her child vaccinated. She’s fiercely protecting her baby against what she sees as harm. The doctor should then steer the conversation toward “protection.”
Reframe the issue.
Don’t call it vaccination. Call it “protection.” Reframing is a powerful persuasion tool; it lets you occupy the high ground of an argument. A vax denier tends to frame the issue around short-term harm. Reframing it around short-term protection—lowering the odds of getting sick within a few short weeks, while protecting those around her.
And don’t forget: be patient.
Listen. Ask questions. Stay calm. And work on the relationship. Achieving herd immunity takes time. And so does persuasion.
